Swimming ear plugs. Where exactly am I supposed to put them?

This year I finally got round to treating my ears to a set of ear plugs for outdoor swimming. I haven’t heard a ‘thank you’ for this gift yet but that might be because my hearing isn’t as good as it once was.

What is surfer’s ear?

If you’re a cold water swimmer, diver, paddler or surfer, you’ll know that continued submersion in cold water and exposure to wind can cause tiny bony growths in the ear (sometimes known as surfer’s ear).

Whilst nobody can see these growths, they really aren’t convenient because they can cause ear infections, and have a negative impact on your hearing.

Time for some new ear plugs

When it comes to keeping the water out, I’ve been really pleased with my new ear plugs. However they have brought about one rather unexpected result. When I put them in and pull my swimming cap down over my ears, the only things I can hear are the water and my heart beat.

Swimming and chatting

When I just want to swim, being unable to hear can be a blessing as it really helps me to focus on my stroke but temporary deafness doesn’t work at all well for one of my favourite watery occupations, the swim chat. This means I have to decide which type of swim I’m going to have before entering the water.

Where to store your ear plugs

I got caught out the other day. I had my ear plugs in but had swum upon some friends. Wanting to chat I removed my ear plugs but then couldn’t work out what to do with them. I trod water for a while with my fist closed over them, and then put the problem to my friends.

The flotation factor

Swimmers are a creative bunch. One suggested I wedged them under my breasts. This seemed like a good plan (I have a generous cleavage) until we added the boob flotation factor into the equation.

In salt water, the only thing holding a decent bosom down is a swimming costume, and it takes a good one to do the job properly. Try skinny dipping with a well-endowed lady, and you’ll see what I mean (you’ll also be very lucky!)

A unique storage solution

In the end I went for a rather ingenious ear plug storage idea, and poked both into my belly button.

It worked, everything, ears, ear plugs and boobs returned safely to shore.

Now I can have the best of both worlds.

Because you never know who you’re going to bump into in the water!


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